Hello!
Hope you have been very well.
Some time ago, a relationship I had went bad and the gentleman’s guardian was trying to help us fix the wrecking ship.
I think that when the kind man saw that we were not ready to fix the situation, he thought it was best to help us figure out the things we got wrong in the relationship.
One of the comments he made to me was, “Sometimes, you can be too independent.”
I didn’t think there was such a thing as being too independent but I knew about being too dependent, being entitled and stuff like that, and I did (do) not want to be that person.
It is okay to not be a pest to other people, to man your space and to handle your issues on your own. I know for sure that I appreciate that quality in people.
However, and in relationships especially, we cannot deny our partners the joy of interdependence.
When your partner feels like you have everything figured out all the time, you take all your decisions by yourself, you hardly ever need their input on matters and you handle everything before they even get to hear about it, it may cause them to second guess your need for them.
You are your own adviser, strategist, motivator, helper, fixer, hypeman and everything else you can think of. You’ve got everything covered!
All good…but you really should let your partner (or friends) be something for you, to you.
You could use some help, you know.
I have published a podcast episode on this.
You really should listen – Can you be too independent?
Also, let me know what you think. It would be exciting to know if you have lived like this at any point in your life and how you reconfigured your mind to accept help.
I really do love you and I want to see you do well.
Love,
Haypreel